The negative effects of lockdowns are worse than you can possibly imagine

Never in our lives have our rulers reached a more catastrophic philosophical and moral conclusion than to ‘lock down’ (horrible expression) their people in response to a virus, particularly one that is not in the top 18 plagues mankind has faced. It is not a just or proportionate response, to put it mildly: in fact it’s the most bizarre and vile thing our government has ever enacted. Done in a [misguided] attempt to give a very small amount of people a few more months of life, the lives of many millions of people have been blighted for a very long time. The calculation that has been made displays the most twisted use of ethical logic that we have seen in the history of the civilised world.

The collateral wreckage of lockdowns becomes more evident by the day, but it’s still impossible to overstate the carnage created on a multitude of levels - there are known levels of collateral damage and there are unknown levels of collateral damage. Our government appears oblivious to the known levels, never mind the unknown levels.

Some may appear trivial, some may be history-changing. I would predict, for instance, that one result of the reaction to this virus will be the break up of the United Kingdom. Next year tartan tinpot Nicola Sturgeon, who has done everything in her power to drive a further wedge between England and Scotland, will win a resounding victory in the Scottish elections and further pile on the pressure for IndyRef2. Boris Johnson will initially resist, but as we know by now that he is a feeble-minded buffoon, he will cave, the referendum will happen, and the Scots will break with England. Of course what will follow the biggest party in Scottish history (provided Sturgeon hasn’t completely banned alcohol by then), will be the biggest hangover ever, as Scotland becomes an economic basket case, shorn of its English currency and generous financial support. But there you go. It won’t be ‘our’ problem any more, but it will be a tragedy that the Union is no more, because it has been so beneficial to both parties.

From the shape of the country to the size of our plates: a friend who eats out a lot (still, despite the experience often being about as pleasant as gargling bleach) tells me that he is sure portions are getting smaller while prices are going up. Is this because desperate restauranteurs are having to continue to make money somehow? Is this yet another indirect consequence of the disastrous lockdowns (a policy so cruel and inhumane it’s almost like it was copied from a totalitarian state like China. Oh, hang on…)? More investigation is needed.

It’s helpful to the human race if it can continue to reproduce, but that’s become slightly more difficult this year. What of dating? How do single people actually go out and meet other singles, even if they’ve connected with them on a dating app? As a friend said to me last week, if you do find someone on there, what are you going to do with her?

A nice trip to the pub?

A nice meal out?

A nice trip to the theatre?

Live music?

Comedy show?

And what will you talk about? Lockdown restrictions?

Tier 1, 2 or 3 preferences?

Politics?

Social justice?

VAR?

Meghan Markle? 

This is all quite amusing, but there’s a deadly serious point behind it. The response to Covid has been horrendously out of proportion and has ripped out the very essence of living itself. What is life?, more and more people will philosophically ask themselves, as their mad, bad and dangerous government drains all colour, meaning and purpose out of their existences.